Dona E. Bowens

Last night in my little baby house and it’s all over but the vacuuming. I could be vacuuming now instead of blogging but fuuuuuuck it, I’ll do it in the morning. And until morning comes, along with the last bit of adulting that I gotta do before boarding the plane, I’m going to indulge myself with devil’s lettuce, jazz and marveling at how the universe has orchestrated this next chapter. I mean, my cheap ass was avoiding buying toilet paper because, god forbid I didn’t shit enough and ended up leaving rolls of toilet paper behind for the next resident to enjoy. The universe fixed that. I just put the last roll on the spool. More than enough to get me to tomorrow, but not so much as to feel like waste.

The universe has been blessing me with abundance while moving obstacles out of my way, often in the most astounding ways. Can we talk about the job I already got in Uruguay? Can we have this discussion? At first, I can’t lie, I was upset because the interview got rescheduled FIVE times. FIVE. My friend Dana said I was experiencing what she called, “Tropical Time.” Things, time itself, moves differently down Uruguay way. She advised me to chill, it’ll get done. And it did—via a Whatsapp call in the end, without video, because when they did finally call, 2 hours before our scheduled meeting, I’d just stepped out of the shower. It wasn’t an interview as much as, “Here’s how we will bring you onboard if you’re amenable.” And then, and this is the abundance part, my new boss asked, “Do you mind if I pass your CV to a couple of my colleagues? Everyone is in need of native speaking teachers.” Do I mind? Listen, Juan, pass me around like the head cheerleader on Homecoming Weekend, ok? How often does that happen? Get one job and they refer you for another mid-interview? Maybe when the universe is vibrating hard in your favor it happens. I’m riding the wave…as if I have a choice. For clarity, the language school teaching racket functions much like a community college. They offer teachers a number of classes and not the typical 40 hour work week. So you can do 3 classes at one joint and 2 at another. And I’ll be doing it online. Yes! Remote work! Business up top and pajamas on the bottom, rolling out of bed 20 minutes before class. My cold, little introverted heart is thrilled.

I’ve done the math and, once the wire transfer hits from the sale of the little baby house, I’ll officially be a millionaire!!!!!! I never in life imagined such abundance…even if it is a million pesos. You know I’m going to ride that millionaire (in pesos) label at least until I have to put a chunk of change down on a flat. And it’s much easier and cheaper to get a flat if you have a job contract, which I’ll have before September rolls around.

I loathe sounding corny and the German side of me bristles at displays of (oof) love. So I can talk about this, I’m going to refer to “love” as “fleas.” Y’all, I am overrun with fleas right now and they’re coming at me from every direction. Fleas from my friends, crazy infestation of fleas from the family and random fleas from strangers who learn about my journey, because I can’t stop running my mouth about it, and wish me nothing but more fleas where I’m going. I have an abundance of fleas. I’m itchy with gratitude.

Roll, universe, Roll!